Interfering Mom Demands to Try on Future Daughter in Law's Wedding Dress, Doesn't Understand Why She's Upset

Author image for Ally Perry
Ally Perry • Writer and Editor
Aug 7, 2023 4:00 PM EDT

I've said it before, and I'll say it again: I don't understand the big furore around weddings. Surely, the quality of the marriage is a lot more important than the day itself. 

That being said, I do think that it is important to respect other peoples' boundaries. No matter how you feel about somebody's special day, it's pretty easy to accept their wishes if they're not hurting anybody.

Unfortunately, though, plenty of people have weird families who don't believe this to be the case. One bizarre instance of this was recently shared on r/AmItheAsshole, when a bride-to-be shared the conundrum she found herself in with her fiancé and future mother-in-law.

For some reason, her partner's mother was obsessed with the idea of trying on her wedding dress. When the bride understandably refused, the woman and her son went behind her back, and got busted doing a secret fitting session. 

To nobody's surprise, everyone on Reddit was on the bride's side with this one. These Freudian mother-son relationships really need to stop. 

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  • 01
    Human body - r/AmltheAsshole u/Repulsive_Scheme1359 • 23h AITA for giving FMIL 3 days to pay me for a new wedding dress or else I show the family a photo of her wearing it?
    via Repulsive_Scheme1359
  • 02
    Font - So, I'm getting married to my fiance soon. I bought my wedding dress weeks ago. His my (FMIL) kept pestering me about trying it on but I firmly refused. I finally shut it down after she offered me 100$ to let her try it on. Her reasoning for presisting so much? She says it's because of her "love" for wedding dresses and her obsession with them.
    via Repulsive_Scheme1359
  • 03
    Font - Fast forward to yesterday, I came home from work early and I found my fiance at home. He freaked out after seeing me and tried to prevent me from going into my room while trying to text somebody on his phone. I opened the door and was shocked to see his mom standing there wearing my dress. I instantly pulled out my phone and took a photo of her in it. Sheand my fiance freaked out after I told her that she needed to pay me for a new dress in 3 days or else I'll show the whole family the ph
    via Repulsive_Scheme1359
  • 04
    Font - I felt awful, but I spent 3k on this dress and worked hard to get it, I can't stand looking at it but people in my family think I'm escalating things and risking my relationship with not only FMIL but my fiance as well. AITA? Update: Oh My God! This blew up, and so I thought I'd add some updates. My fiance called and offered to pay for the dress himself so we can "end the conflict" but he wants me to : • hand him my phone so he can delete the photo himself. • Swear that I don't have any c
    via Repulsive_Scheme1359
  • 05
    Font - I haven't responded yet. P.s He called with this offer/conditions hours ago but I didn't want to include this in the post but now I did. Also, I'm not sure if I'll agree because I don't want him to pay for it, I want his mom, the one who wore it to pay for it. Not being vicious but trying to hold her accountable.
    via Repulsive_Scheme1359
  • 06
    Font - Moose-Live 23h - Edited Colo-rectal Surgeon [31] 63.6k NTA, but are you sure you want to marry this guy? He stood guard outside your bedroom so that his mother could try on your wedding dress. Do you think he will ever stand up for you against her? Edit: thank you for the awards! ☆☆☆ Also: I think all the "incest" suggestions are way off base. He's just an AH who can't say no to his mother and is prepared to deceive OP if it will shut his mother up. His mother OTOH is controlling, manipul
    via Moose-Live
  • 07
    Font - 25.4k ↓ aterriblefriend0 22h NTA, but the problem isn't just your FML. It's your fiance. HE let her in. HE was going to lie and hide from you that she tried it on. HE is defending her actions. HE disrespected your belongings. HE didn't care about your feelings and still doesn't. HE has shown he doesn't care about your boundaries. HE decided his mother's want to try it on is more important than your feelings, and that won't go away when you're married. Personally? My petty self would call
    via aterriblefriend0
  • 08
    Font - Connect-Yam5209 23h. E... 11.7k ↓ He knowingly went behind your back to help his mom try on your dress. He knew it was wrong, he knew you would be upset and yet he did it anyway. Then he doubled down and defended his mother when you caught them. You don't have a MIL problem, you have a husband problem. Do not marry with this man without addressing and resolving this issue. It will literally only get worse from here. ΝΤΑ
    via Connect-Yam5209
  • 09
    Organism - SirRabbott 21h *tripled down ... 44.2k ↓ because when she came home he continued to try and stop her from going upstairs while he franticly texts his mom as if he was having an affair partner over. Bro is getting pretty close to having his own theme park titled "six red flags"
    via SirRabbott
  • 10
    Rectangle - elodieitsbeenawhile 23h Partassipant [2] 9.6k Why would you marry someone who went against your wishes like this and then treated you like the villain for being upset your boundaries were crossed?
    via elodieitsbeenawhile
  • 11
    Font - Champi_Feuille 23h Asshole Aficionado [19] 44.6k ↓ NTA but honestly don't ask for money. He stood guard while his mom tried on your dress, you really wanna get stuck in a relationship like this? ... Show the photo to everyone, cancel the wedding and dump his ass. You deserve better than that.
    via Champi_Feuille
  • 12
    Font - Phoenix612 23h Asshole Aficionado [12] NTA. : G 3.5k He yelled at mr and told me to wake up and stop treating his mom like that. This is concerning. Wake up to what? That he's always going to take her side? What about how she treated you when she violated a very simply boundary of not fricking wearing your dress. Its insane that not only did she ask, she asked repeatedly.
    via Phoenix612
  • 13
    Font - Diasies_inMyHair 23h Partassipant [2] 43.1k ↓ NTA. You might want to reconsider the wedding altogether. Your fiancee allowed her in, was trying to cover for her, and then blew up at you for being upset! Did she model the dress for him? Because if she did or was going to, I'm afraid that would be a dealbreaker for me, the whole idea of the Groom seeing his Mother in the wedding gown BEFORE the Bride wears it is just....gross. Even worse if the Groom were on board with that.
    via Diasies_inMyHair
  • 14
    Font - ReviewOk929 23h Certified Proctologist [27] ... 1.7k 1. Fiance betrayed your trust 2. FMIL did something she knew would upset you 3. Your fiance yelled at you 4. Look you maybe being slightly unreasonable with replacing the dress but why the fuck you would still go through with the wedding is beyond me..... 5. Neither of them care about you and what you think and feel.... 6. Little bit of everyone sucking but on balance NTA
    via ReviewOk929
  • 15
    Font - Rohini_rambles 23h Colo-rectal Surgeon [38] Think about it. ... G 41.6k ↓ Your fiance wanted to see his mom in your wedding dress first..... Never compete with a mother to win over a mama boy. You deserve better. NTA This will be your life if you stay with this guy. She'll come to honeymoons, vacation, delivery room, all these will be the battles you fight both of them on.
    via Rohini_rambles

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aita marriage wtf relationships wedding dresses wedding mother in law clothing wedding dress fiancé Reddit
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